My Bucket List....

The topic of the "BUCKET LIST" is a little morbid, but I've been putting off creating my list for some time now. I realize that I'm not that old....but I'm also not getting any younger, and if there is one thing I know for sure, it's that time gets away from us faster than we'd care to admit.

I've had a running list in my head. Some are one time events, others are goals for myself. Here are some categories of items, events, and other experiences I'd like to explore before I am gone for good....

For simplistic purposes, I will begin with a bullet pointed list:

• Learn to read music
• Play an instrument (Piano? pick up violin again? or Bass Guitar?---all three!)
• Learn Spanish, then Italian
• Start (and publish) my Coffee Table Book concept
• Travel: Spain, Greece, Chile, Argentina, (see more of Mexico), return to Germany (with Jade), Italy, France, and Austria. See Morocco, India, China, Japan....and more. (Food, art, culture, and places to see.)
• R.V. tour the U.S. with JB and mountain bikes in tow----visit as many brew-pubs as humanly possible along the way.
• Mtn. Bike & hike the Arizona Trail, end to end.
• Learn to ski
• Attend a yoga retreat (or two or more)
• Own a successful business (massage, jewelry, aromatherapy, yoga, and organic/natural body care products)
• Take continuing education classes in Massage. (LaStone, chakra alignment, Thai Yoga Massage, Aromatherapy, more Anatomy!)
• Make yoga a regular practice for me. Learn more about it, and learn to read/speak Sanskrit.
• Return to school to get my Master's in Art History, then teach Art History.
• Make a healthy lifestyle for myself and children/family. (LIVE active and EAT healthy)
• Road-Trip the Pacific Coast Highway end to end in the Jeep.
• Volunteer for the National Forest Service (camp ground host & trail maintenance)

I think that's a good start. I'm sure there are more that I can't think of right now, and there will be more that pop up. For now, I've got some work to do!

Ten Months, Plus

January.

My last month since I'd posted anything in my blog.

Certainly a testament to how busy I've been.

I have many excuses....a "scroll of excuses" as Mr. Sanders would say.

But I offer no apologies.

I've simply been working, and working diligently. I committed myself to finding a new career path, and I dove in deep.

It is good for me to seize these moments of reflection. I have felt glimpses of corporate burn out, and should, by all intensive purposes, be completely disenfranchised by the whole thing....but I'm not.

Yet.

I've been surrounded by many who've shared with me their stories of guts and glory with "rising to the top" from the bottom, or nowhere, or wherever they claim to have started.

But I am one of "those people" who must experience it first hand.

I am in it.

I'm in the muck. I'm also in the glory of it.

The glory, as anyone would guess, is what I am feeding off of.

The muck...not so desirable, but I understand the significance of it.

Either way, I am LEARNING.

And as I may have mentioned before....I am a lifelong student.

As long as I am a willing participant in an environment conducive to growth and learning....I am present.

Tune Up

So yesterday I received what my dear friend April refers to as a "Tune Up". I was overdue by a very long shot.

Allow me to explain.

Immediately after graduating from massage school, I dove straight into working. I was hungry for experience, and even hungrier for income. A majority of my focus over the last year has been on work, work, and more work. I've come a long way for sure, but I've been neglecting something, or I should say someONE a little too much. I've been neglecting ME. More precisely, I've neglected my spirit. Now, that's not to say I've neglected my soul. I've certainly been in tune with what I need to do, and how to spend time with my family and with my Brian. But I haven't been doing things often enough to edify my spiritual side.

While going through the massage program, I was learning about Eastern bodywork and philosophies. I had been giving and receiving this type of bodywork on a regular basis, but then stopped after I graduated.

Well, it has caught up with me. In a big way.

I had been feeling that disconnect for quite a while. An imbalance. And it all came to a head over the last few days. A series of small events occurred, and I could no longer ignore that the universe, and my spirit were telling me something.

Enter, April.

April is very dear to me. We were Comrades in Massage school, and now we are both Teaching Assistants there...but more than that, we are friends. Yesterday I met with April, and she asked me what was going on. I attempted to tell her how I was feeling, but couldn't quite succeed without the tears falling. I told her how I just felt imbalanced. I could just FEEL all the bottled up "junk" I had inside me.

After talking for a bit, she and I settled on a session of Acupressure*, with a Chakra alignment**

.....a "Tune-Up".

Bingo! Perfect.

Before we began, April asked me to select crystals from her collection, so that she could include them in the session. Interestingly enough, I had selected the same type of crystals I used to carry around with me when I was younger.

Tiger's eye.

Amethyst.

Green Aventurine.

Smoky Quartz.

Malachite.

"We are old friends", I told April. Funny how we naturally regress when in need of comfort.

I relaxed into the massage table, closed my eyes, taking several deep breaths.

April proceeded to gently surround me with the crystals I'd selected.

What happened over the next hour was.....emotional, to say the least.

I felt my body melt.

I never once opened my eyes.

I knew I was in a safe place to battle out my little demons I'd been carrying and I struggled with my body to release them. They were those self-depleting thoughts and feelings. You know the ones. They can be a cancer....locking in, then spreading, and eventually seeping in to all you do.

Well, I came head to head with each of them.

I cried them out.

And with each gradual purge, I welcomed cleansing breath.

As the session came to a close, I felt RELIEF.

April and I exchanged our experience with the session, and there's no way to really go into that kind of depth...but it was beneficial for us both.

Later, I went home and slept. Ah, blissful sleep. When I woke, I felt lighter. I felt balanced.

I rummaged through some of my old things, and found that little pouch I used to wear in High School. I used it to carry my crystals or stones in it, as little reminders of the types of energy I needed for the day. I grabbed my amethyst, popped it in, and around my neck it went. At bedtime, I placed it under my pillow....and slept like a baby.

Today, I've been reflecting on that session, and I probably will for a while. One thing I know for sure is, I will not allow myself to go that long without acknowledging my spirit, and feeding it what it needs.

*http://www.acupressure.com/

**http://www.healinggateways.com/ChakraBalancing.shtml